Shocking Numbers Show African American Community Flourishing During Recession
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Scratching, Surviving, and Thriving
A report issued today by the General Roundtable on the Economic Encouragement of Negros (GREENS) stated that, “Due to the overwhelming impact of the collapsed credit market, the dissolution of the banking and finance sectors, and now the impending implosion of the domestic auto industry, blacks, who have a four hundred year history of making due with next to nothing, are finding their survival skills are now in high demand.”
In Oakland, California, one Soul Food Cooking School instructor noted that class enrollment is at an all time high. Miss Betty Collards, head of the school told BlackPower.com, “I ain’t never seen this many white folks sign up for classes. Now that they can only afford neckbones and beans, they’ve discovered they don’t know what to do with them.”
Miss Collards, who also participated in the GREENS study, said that all of her friends and neighbors with kitchen hair salons, black market cd businesses, and hand car washes are thriving during this downturn. In fact, several community entrepreneurs have set up a Survival School for the Formerly Wealthy.
“I am in charge of the Make Due with Less curriculum, while my husband, who was a mortgage broker with Wells Fargo until recently, is running our budgeting and financial management program: Paycheck to Paycheck, How to Make that Dollar Stretch,” said Miss Collards.
The GREENS institute study determined that even at times when the U.S. economy is thriving, the massive wealth and affluence, still largely based on the enormous wealth created by slave labor and continued on low wage labor performed by blacks, Latinos, immigrants and poor whites, does not reach the hardest hit. The study concluded that even when the economy is roaring, most of the black community lives in recession.
Miss Collards commented that, “I don’t need a study to tell me that when those white folks that started Facebook and other dot coms and stuff were making their billions that didn’t mean a damn thing for working class black folks. As a matter of fact, real incomes for black folks declined in the late 1990s when America was at the height of its so-called boom.”
She concluded with, “Boom. Boom my ass. Boom is the sound that those white folks jaws made when they saw the big board at the stock exchange this morning.”
Already, the GREENS study found, President-elect Barack Obama is being called on to clean up the mess created by his soon to be predecessor. And the white folks in charge are getting antsy. Barack Obama has largely stayed hands off asserting that there can be only one President at a time. An assertion that holds water.
But, House Banking and Finance Committee Chairperson, Rep. Barney Frank (D-MA) has been all up in the President-elect’s kool aid calling on him to take a more active role in solving the financial crisis.
The GREENS study found that Representative Frank should shut the hell up and sit down as the President-elect can only participate in negotiations, but his power to enact change is rightfully limited until January 20, 2009 when he becomes president.
In the end, the GREENS report concluded that the African-American community will weather this recession with the same creativity, passion, and hamhocks that has kept it solvent for the last 400 years.
“Times are always at or near rough for our people. But love, community, and some black eyed peas go a long way to making things alright,” quipped Miss Betty Collards.
The GREENS report agreed.
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hilarious and, although obviously fiction, rings of truth. we’ve always made lemonade out of lemons. black folks have been living in their own particular recessions for generations.
> ali
very funny!
> Lanette
Thanks so much for your comments! If you like my articles, please pass them along to your friends.
> Brandon Lacy Campos
I think you’re on to something here. Perhaps the BLC school of TLC for the checkbook.
> David Berube
Hilarious — this should be a sitcom!
> Ann
Brandon that article was hilarious. “Boom my ass. Boom is the sound that those white folks jaws made when they saw the big board at the stock exchange this morning.†Classic.
> Steven Renderos
ok, that was funny.
> Susan Raffo
Hilarious, but true!
> Latashia
This is the funniest thing I’ve read in the last two minutes.
Well done.
> Kristina
Have you been listening to my phone conversations?
Laugh of the week!
> iamnotstarjones
Funny but a lot rings true.
> Carl Elliott
This thing was so hilarious! I forwarded it a bunch of my friends! GREENS…Sweet Lord…too much.
> de
[...] American Community Flourishing … Posted in December 8th, 2008 by in Uncategorized » Shocking Numbers Show African American Community Flourishing … Miss Collards, who also participated in the GREENS study, said that all of her friends and [...]
> » » Shocking Numbers Show African American Community Flourishing … White House On Best Political Blogs: News And Info On White House
[...] » Shocking Numbers Show African American Community Flourishing … Miss Collards, who also participated in the GREENS study, said that all of her friends and neighbors with kitchen hair salons, black market cd businesses, and hand car washes are thriving during this downturn. In fact, several community … [...]
> Whitehouse On Best Political Blogs » » Shocking Numbers Show African American Community Flourishing …
This something that a lot of us have been talking about at work. For years many black people have been in permanent recessions and this is nothing new to them. We’ve been watching how our co-workers have been handling this. I live within my means and I’m not in the business of impressing others. This economic downturn is an equal opportunity destroyer. When it was happening to mostly minorities it was their problem, now whites are affected, it’s now a problem that must be fixed instantaneously. I laugh at the fashion magazines that are now teaching their readers about shopping for less expensive clothes, something we’ve also known for years is now laughable. When you are mostly identified by skin privilege, materialism and nothing else you can not survive. The problem for many black people and those with families is that we became just as immoral as the wealthy elite in our quest to live like them. We forgot about values and family only concentrating on “getting money” at any costs. This economic downturn gives many of us an opportunity to regain our families back that we lost in the shuffle. They can learn a lot from the permanent underclass of this country. Money is not everything when you are missing the most important human qualities.
> Yvonne C.
“Boom my ass. Boom is the sound that those white folks jaws made when they saw the big board at the stock exchange this morning.†Ain’t that the truth. This was a hilarious and great article. Boom was the sound they heard so loud that old white men started killing themselves when the millions disappeared.
> Michelle
Dear Yvonne: WORD WORD WORD!
Michelle: You are out of control…but speaking the truth. Thank you for the kudos on the article.
> Brandon Lacy Campos
This is a informative blog and I will be back soon. Thanks for the beneficial message! I hope all is well.
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